Possibly throwing a party with underage drinking, any tips/advice?

[CrownSlayers Shadow]

As a matter of fact I am taking your guys' advice to heart, specifically those who don't come in with a condescending attitude. ChaosSupremeSonic's posts in particular have been pretty helpful as well as a bunch of other ones. I don't understand why this is such a racy subject to all of you guys and why such negative energy surrounds your posts. Regardless of what I'm doing is legal or not, being called an idiot and that "the only reason to do such and such things is if you're depressed" is quite demeaning and uncalled for.

The reason why is because it basically IS an idiotic thing to do, dude. Particularly the smoking weed. That's generally why you're getting these responses.

But I feel that a bigger idiot is one who isn't prepared or too careless for these things. At the very least, you need to be careful about these things because although things may be lax where you live, there are legal consequences regardless. Now, I personally don't care about the underage drinking. I'm 20 years old and I drink alcohol (wines preferably, but regardless I drink occasionally and at my house or some place I plan to sleep over at and never drink if I'm a driver), so I can relate. But the weed? I personally stay far the fuck away from that as possible due to the repercussions surrounding it.

People party, people drink, people (regrettably) smoke, all in the name of fun. But don't let the fun get so out of hand for you that you get into shit you regret.

Edited April 9, 2012 by ChaosSupremeSonic

[Solid SOAP]

But I feel that a bigger idiot is one who isn't prepared or too careless for these things. At the very least, you need to be careful about these things because although things may be lax where you live, there are legal consequences regardless. Now, I personally don't care about the underage drinking. I'm 20 years old and I drink alcohol (wines preferably, but regardless I drink occasionally and at my house or some place I plan to sleep over at and never drink if I'm a driver), so I can relate.

Which is why I'm looking to be higher educated and go into planning this party with these things in mind, as opposed to winging it like I've done twice in the past and yielded mixed results.

But the weed? I personally stay far the fuck away from that as possible due to the repercussions surrounding it.

This I don't understand. Smoking weed has been decriminalized where I live, thus the ramifications regarding being caught with it are greatly lowered than what they once were. Unless you are caught with roughly an ounce of the drug (Which is about 28 dubs, $560 worth), you can't really be arrested for it unless there is reason to believe you are selling it. The health issues regarding smoking are significantly less dangerous than those regarding alcohol, and under the impression that those who smoke less than once or twice a week keep it at that, I'd hardly consider it "idiotic".

[Tornado]

This I don't understand. Smoking weed has been decriminalized where I live, thus the ramifications regarding being caught with it are greatly lowered than what they once were.

You would have saved yourself an awful lot of grief if you had made this known in the beginning. I wasn't aware of that for your situation, for example.

Just Saiyan.

Edited April 9, 2012 by Tornado

[Solid SOAP]

You would have saved yourself an awful lot of grief if you had made this known in the beginning. I wasn't aware of that for your situation, for example.

Just Saiyan.

I mean, I assumed this was the case for all of New York and was common knowledge.

[LunarEdge]

I mean, I assumed this was the case for all of New York and was common knowledge.

You know what they say... to assume is to make an ass out of you and me.

Have fun with your party

Edited April 9, 2012 by LunarEdge

[Tornado]

You can still go to jail for it depending on the circumstances, ie. if any of those party goers leaves the house.

Edit: And while I was aware of it and was mostly worried about you having enough of it at the party so it crosses back into criminal charges, most of the people on this board would not be aware of New York State laws, no matter how old they are. Considering how many people are arrested over the "in public view" corollary of the law, I wouldn't be surprised if a lot of people in New York weren't aware of it.

Edited April 9, 2012 by Tornado

[CrownSlayers Shadow]

Which is why I'm looking to be higher educated and go into planning this party with these things in mind, as opposed to winging it like I've done twice in the past and yielded mixed results.

Good, but all the planning you go though can still be wrecked by some other idiot who wants to make a ruckus. You jusr need to make sure to handle that.

This I don't understand. Smoking weed has been decriminalized where I live, thus the ramifications regarding being caught with it are greatly lowered than what they once were. Unless you are caught with roughly an ounce of the drug (Which is about 28 dubs, $560 worth), you can't really be arrested for it unless there is reason to believe you are selling it. The health issues regarding smoking are significantly less dangerous than those regarding alcohol, and under the impression that those who smoke less than once or twice a week keep it at that, I'd hardly consider it "idiotic".

Well see, I live in Texas. And as easy as it would be for me to look up the laws regarding this stuff (which obviously I haven't), at the moment I don't know anything about the legal repercussions of smoking weed aside from the fact that you can get arrested for having it. That wouldn't mean much to me if it weren't for the fact that you can easily smell the stuff if you're not careful with it.

And honestly, I consider drinking enough for me. I wouldn't touch cigarettes, and while I know that weed is much less harmful, I wouldn't touch it either. Were that not the case, I'd occassionally dab into it every few whiles, but currently, it's not something I'm gonna bother with.

It's also because of these things that I don't throw parties myself. I'd much rather go to someone else's than be the one to clean up the mess and worry about other stuff.

Edited April 9, 2012 by ChaosSupremeSonic

[Stacy]

30 to 40 people? Good luck with that!

EDIT: Also who the hell has that many "friends"?

Edited April 9, 2012 by BW199148

[LunarEdge]

30 to 40 people? Good luck with that!

EDIT: Also who the hell has that many "friends"?

I kinda do. I wouldn't say they were close friends, I only have a handful of those. It's easy to gather that many people around though, seeing how there could be friends of friends and such. I mean, I know a few people I call friends but I only come in contact with them via other friends. I guess they should be called acquaintances, but you get what I'm saying.

Also, I'm pretty sure if I posted on my FB page that I was having a party and put down when, my address and my phone number I'll have a good amount of people show up. Either that or he really personally knows 30+ people like that XD

[Stacy]

I kinda do. I wouldn't say they were close friends, I only have a handful of those. It's easy to gather that many people around though, seeing how there could be friends of friends and such. I mean, I know a few people I call friends but I only come in contact with them via other friends. I guess they should be called acquaintances, but you get what I'm saying.

Also, I'm pretty sure if I posted on my FB page that I was having a party and put down when, my address and my phone number I'll have a good amount of people show up. Either that or he really personally knows 30+ people like that XD

I am the only who thinks that a bad idea? Seriously you don't really know these people so how can you trust them in your house?

Also isn't advertising a party on Facebook is a really bad idea, I mean anyone could turn up.

[Conando]

Here's the advice. Don't. Don't ever do that. Ever. If anything happens, you will be fucked for supplying alcohol to minors, even if you didn't actually supply it.

[Blue Blood]

30 to 40 people? Good luck with that!

Beyond the rest of the issues, this stood out. That's just way too many for you to hope to keep things low-key. Also everything else that Tornado and CSS said. Bloody hell.

[CrownSlayers Shadow]

Beyond the rest of the issues, this stood out. That's just way too many for you to hope to keep things low-key. Also everything else that Tornado and CSS said. Bloody hell.

I am the only who thinks that a bad idea? Seriously you don't really know these people so how can you trust them in your house?

Also isn't advertising a party on Facebook is a really bad idea, I mean anyone could turn up.

...

I take it you guys have never been to a house party? Because that is way too ignorant a statement to take seriously.

There are house parties that can practically have more than just 30-40 people depending on the size of the house, and the host can be unfamiliar with a lot of people. That doesn't mean it's impossible for someone who knows how to handle things to keep under control.

Edited April 9, 2012 by ChaosSupremeSonic

[Carbo]

...

I take it you guys have never been to a house party? Because that is way too ignorant a statement to take seriously.

There are house parties that can practically have more than just 30-40 people depending on the size of the house, and the host can be unfamiliar with a lot of people. That doesn't mean it's impossible for someone who knows how to handle things to keep under control.

I doubt that's even their point. The amount of people wouldn't even be a problem if it weren't for the fact that he's having responsibility worries about getting caught having alcohol or weed among minors, and if those two aspects need to in any way "make" the party, a clean cut solution would be cutting down those numbers.

Then again I fucking hate parties that have more than 10 people around so I can't say I'm qualified to make a statement.

[Scar]

...

I take it you guys have never been to a house party? Because that is way too ignorant a statement to take seriously.

We live in the UK, where it is almost impossible to fit 30-40 people in a single house without being noticed, unless you're REALLY fucking rich and have a large house/mansion. See its a small country and houses down here miniscule compared to the average house in the states.

There are house parties that can practically have more than just 30-40 people depending on the size of the house, and the host can be unfamiliar with a lot of people. That doesn't mean it's impossible for someone who knows how to handle things to keep under control.

Things work differently I guess.

In all honestly, I find it difficult to imagine a single individual keeping control of 30-40 others when there is alcohol and/or smokes on offer. The likelihood of the majority getting drunk and being uncontrollable is higher and thus, so is the risk of getting caught. Generally, when you're drunk you lose perspective of any consequences and you become very noisy.

Don't know if its any different in the States, but that's at least what I'd imagine would happen when there's booze. I mean unless everyone is responsible enough to stick to a couple pints of beer and no more than that. Given that there are under-aged people involved, I very much doubt that is the case though. If it is, then I apologise for over-generalising, but I just don't see it happening.

Because I'm not from America, its hard for me to give any kind of reasoned advice any way.

Edited April 9, 2012 by Scar

[Stacy]

...

I take it you guys have never been to a house party? Because that is way too ignorant a statement to take seriously.

There are house parties that can practically have more than just 30-40 people depending on the size of the house, and the host can be unfamiliar with a lot of people. That doesn't mean it's impossible for someone who knows how to handle things to keep under control.

Hows that ignorant?

Would you invite a stranger into your home? No probably not.So why would you let 30 or more strangers into your house? In Your parents house!

Teenagers let loose with weed, alcohol and hormones what could possibly go wrong?

Fine don't take me seriously, but if things go south don't say I and others didn't warn you.

Edited April 9, 2012 by BW199148

[CrownSlayers Shadow]

I doubt that's even their point. The amount of people wouldn't even be a problem if it weren't for the fact that he's having responsibility worries about getting caught having alcohol or weed among minors, and if those two aspects need to in any way "make" the party, a clean cut solution would be cutting down those numbers.

Edited April 9, 2012 by ChaosSupremeSonic

[SoniClub]

Jeeze, hate to say it but, as ChaosSurpeme said, some people here clearly haven't been to an house party before, more particularly an underage one. Also, the guy asked for advice, not your moral high-ground :L And just cause something is illegal doesn't mean it's bad, make your own rational opinions guys, don't let the law do that for you.

Our year group has parties like these a few times a month, and tbh i'm quite shocked at how people on here are acting quite hostile towards the idea. Seemingly the laws in the U.S are a lot stricter, because seriously, the biggest worry we have at these is whether or not parents will get angry/find out about what goes on.

It sounds to me like the police are a lot more involved in stuff like this as I have only once been to a party where they turned up, and that was because a door got smashed down by some gate-crashers and the parents naturally needed help getting everyone out. (This was about 80 people mind you in a average sized house)

Otherwise the only time we encounter Police is when we're outside drinking/smoking, in which case they only ever seem to search bags, confiscate stuff and send you off home.

As for advice, firstly, make a private event on Facebook. No letting others to invite their own friends, and certainly not an open event.

Secondly, i'd say you are looking good for around 30 people, that way, it'll feel like enough for a party, but not be anything that you can't control. If you wanna play it safe however- 25. From the sounds of it though any more than 30 and you may be putting yourself at risk from these nosy Feds.

As for your choice of substances, let people know as they come in to keep their stuff on the downlow. Some will of course ignore you, but it's better than saying nothing. Oh, and remember ashtrays.

The main thing to keep your party low-key is the music, perhaps only use speakers that don't go all that loud. As it's the one thing i'm sure you'll know, people will not listen at all when you ask them to turn it down.

And finally, kick people out at a reasonable time, 11/half 11 is usally a good one. Depends on when you start though, just make sure you kick out those that aren't staying over in time to catch their relevant transport.

Otherwise I can't think of anything else, good luck and have a great time! Drag some closer friends into helping you tidy up in the morning, let us know how it goes!

[JezMM]

Would you invite a stranger into your home? No probably not.So why would you let 30 or more strangers into your house? In Your parents house!

They aren't strangers, he already said that. They're friends of friends at the very most. I dunno about you but when I've hung out with friends of friends before I don't back away from them as if they're strangers. The idea is you trust your friends and therefore trust their judgement of these people, and have a general good faith towards the fact that they are reasonable, intelligent people. If it turns out they aren't you can kick them out.

Teenagers let loose with weed, alcohol and hormones what could possibly go wrong?

You say that like there's no such thing as a teenager who has limits and intelligence.

[Carbo]

My roomates/friends have had birthday parties where we managed to have 18 people in our duplex all at once (keep in mind, I wasn't throwing the party here), and we knew each and every one of them bar 1 or 2. On top of that, it was a private party, so you couldn't get in if you weren't known by the group.

So I'm a little more qualified to know how these things go than you do. And even more, I'm not exactly much of a social person myself.

You speak to me as if I haven't been to a ton of parties, mostly on account of obligation and/or lack of better things to do, or that I don't know the concept of a private party which is pretty much the only kind of which I tolerate, so your last statement strikes me as a pretty arrogant statement to make. Your example isn't anything I haven't experienced.

[CrownSlayers Shadow]

We live in the UK, where it is almost impossible to fit 30-40 people in a single house without being noticed, unless you're REALLY fucking rich and have a large house/mansion. See its a small country and houses down here miniscule compared to the average house in the states.

So, I guess the whole small European house thing is true then. XD

No seriously tho. I live in a duplex, essentially half of a two story house next door to people who reside in the other half. My half of the dublex fitted at least 18 people and could definitely have managed 25 people or more. I've been to house parties with no less than 35 people, and only knew 5 people there.

So maybe it's a cultural difference here, because 30 isn't really too big a number for a house party here.

You speak to me as if I haven't been to a ton of parties, mostly on account of obligation and/or lack of better things to do, or that I don't know the concept of a private party which is pretty much the only kind of which I tolerate, so your last statement strikes me as a pretty arrogant statement to make. Your example isn't anything I haven't experienced.

Eh, sorry. It really sounded like you didn't go to a lot a parties because having no more than 10 people is more of a "get together" here, and combine that on top of not liking anything more than that only makes me assume further that you actively avoid going to larger parties. Probably shouldn't have said "I'm more qualified", but the way you worded it didn't exactly make me believe otherwise.

But as for you not knowing the concept of a private party? No, that's just me informing others incase they happen to read on here.

Edited April 9, 2012 by ChaosSupremeSonic

[Stacy]

They aren't strangers, he already said that. They're friends of friends at the very most. I dunno about you but when I've hung out with friends of friends before I don't back away from them as if they're strangers. The idea is you trust your friends and therefore trust their judgement of these people, and have a general good faith towards the fact that they are reasonable, intelligent people. If it turns out they aren't you can kick them out.

You say that like there's no such thing as a teenager who has limits and intelligence.

Yeah I haven't been to has a house party, because it is not my thing, I hate that kind of thing.

My Sister threw one with about 20 people and these were people she knew and it turn to shit especially seeing as the neighbours house is connected to our house, they stole stuff, it was horrible, it wasn't fair on my parents when my sister promised she would only have less then five people over.

I didn't say that everybody was I immature Jez, but 30 people come on especially if say half of them you don't know, I just wouldn't be comfortable with that especially in my parents house.

Also the whole freind of a friend of a friend thing doesn't fill with confidence not to mention its a high school term.

I way over shit like this anyway. It never apealled to me.

[Indigo Rush]

I'm not sure why you're surprised you were met with so much criticism for your post, SOAP. Your topic asked how you should go about hosting a party that features alcohol with underage minors which is illegal, and then proceed to talk about smoking weed which is also illegal. I don't know much about the town where you live in, all I know is that generally, breaking the law isn't the brightest idea, and every consequence should be taken into account. If anything, take the criticism as evidence that we all care about you and your safety and don't want to see anything bad happen.

I'm not trying to come across as if you (or your friends) don't have any judgement abilities or common sense, but I personally just find it strange that you'd ask us the best way to break the law without getting caught. Forgive me if I'm getting the wrong idea, but this is essentially what I'm getting from this.

That being said, I'm not on the side of the fence that really cares for big parties or drinking or smoking. A little wine or beer is fine with me though I avoid smoking of any kind (my lungs haven't exactly been in the best shape this past year, so I try to avoid smokers as well) but that's my background. Since you're going to go through with this regardless, just try to keep it low key and try to organize it so you don't leave a colossal mess or anything, and make sure your guests make it home safe. Obviously don't smoke/drink out front where the fuzz can see you clearly, and don't be afraid to send someone home if they try to start something. I'm not sure if this is common sense or not honestly... like I said, I don't go to any parties, and this just seems like the best pointers I can give.

Condescending legal statements aside, I hope the party goes well. Stay safe and have fun.

Edited April 9, 2012 by Indigo Rush

[Scar]

So, I guess the whole small European house thing is true then. XD

Yes it is. Well, if you're a middle-class citizen at least.

No seriously tho. I live in a duplex, essentially half of a two story house next door to people who reside in the other half. My half of the dublex fitted at least 18 people and could definitely have managed 25 people or more. I've been to house parties with no less than 35 people, and only knew 5 people there.

I guess we could fit that many people in our house if that is the case. I just wouldn't want to. 10 close friends at most. More than that is too crowded for my tastes. Plus, I don't believe alcohol is necessary to have a good time.

So maybe it's a cultural difference here, because 30 isn't really too big a number for a house party here.

Maybe so. I don't know if what I've seen is representative of the whole country, or even the whole city, but somewhere between 15-20 is the upper limit as far as I've seen.

Also, the guy asked for advice, not your moral high-ground :L And just cause something is illegal doesn't mean it's bad, make your own rational opinions guys, don't let the law do that for you.

I don't really care about underaged drinking, its none of my business, but the law exists for a reason. There are consequences, and people who are being "condescending" and "takeing the moral high ground" are only really looking out for you. Certainly, I don't want anyone here getting arrested over something like this.

You say that like there's no such thing as a teenager who has limits and intelligence.

Alcohol and drugs can affect even the smartest individual's judgement. Not to mention those who are irresponsible , are going to be louder, noisier and generally more noticable then those who are responsible. A handful of people who are absolutely plastered are going to get noticed and may well blow it for the the responsible majority.

I hope this party doesn't get.....er.....shut down, as it were. Have fun and make sure people who're drunk don't make a lot of noise.

[Carbo]

Eh, sorry. It really sounded like you didn't go to a lot a parties because having no more than 10 people is more of a "get together" here, and combine that on top of not liking anything more than that only makes me assume further that you actively avoid going to larger parties. Probably shouldn't have said "I'm more qualified", but the way you worded it didn't exactly make me believe you would do any of that.

But as for you not knowing the concept of a private party? No, that's just me informing others incase they happen to read on here.

I didn't really want to bud in onto the main line of discussion mostly because I'm not really much of a party kind of guy, even setting aside that I do have a fair share of experience from them. I'm mostly the "hey let's get a healthy bunch of bros together so we can fuck around, play some video games, watch a movie and have snacks" kind of guy, and I guess you can account that to my grade-A reclusive persona, and that I prefer a compact environment. So on that end, yeah, I can't say I'm that qualified on account of personal biases. I probably should have elaborated more on that end.

The only thing I'm saying here is I can understand why people would criticize 40-attendants or so if only for the fact that someone is relatively unsure about the potential consequences and how to work around them. Setting biases aside, it's pretty hard to keep such a thing low-key, and one solution to that problem is decreasing your numbers and not bringing over guys you don't really know. For a house-party that may not be the most favorable thing to do, but if you want to play favorably it's advisable to not have your own cake and eat it.