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[Fiction] Sonic: Warped World


Potada

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Well, I've had this story idea for a while and finally decided to share it. It's only the first chapter (and the only chapter, at the moment) but, hopefully, I'll actually keep this going. Fingers crossed, and I hope you enjoy!

Spoiler

Sonic: Warped World

Chapter 1

A light breeze rolled through Green Hill Zone, the grass rustling at the wind’s slightest touch. As the sun slowly shifted through the cloudless sky, a certain blue hedgehog sat underneath a palm tree, stretching his limbs while letting out a long yawn.

“Mmm…Man, sure has been quiet lately. I haven’t heard a peep out of Ol’ Eggman in a while.” Sonic chuckled to himself as a lay on his back. “Then again, he got pretty scrambled last time we tussled. Maybe he’ll give up the whole world conquering shtick.” He let out a hardy laugh. “Yeah, right. That’ll be the day.”

Before long, the blue hedgehog nodded off to sleep, the warm rays of the sun lulling him to dreamland. Soon, however, he found himself awoken by a loud…

BOOM!

“Huh?! Wuzzat?!” Sonic’s stupor only lasted a second before he spotted something in the distance. “Woah. Who ordered the giant Christmas light?” Then again, he thought, he’d never seen a purple Christmas light. Sonic squinted. “Hey, isn’t that…?” Before he could investigate, the light flashed with a blinding intensity as another loud bang shattered the silence. Sonic covered his eyes as a pulsing noise filled the air.

“WOAH!”

---

He wasn’t sure how long he’d kept his eyes shut. Did the light die out finally? He didn’t hear anything. Carefully, Sonic moved his hands down as he opened his eyes.

“Jeez, what was with that light show? Talk about…nuts?”

The hedgehog’s arms dropped to his sides at the sight before him. The once green pastures were now grey and blue as a red sun shown in a violet sky. Pieces of the landscape were either gone or floating in place, as if the missing pieces still supported them. The trees were slowly withering as pink clouds started to gather.

“Holy…! What happened?!” Sonic looked all around him before he noticed something falling from the sky. “What’s this black stuff?” As it slowly floated down, the blue blur suddenly noticed a chill in the air. A piece of the black fluff landed on his nose.

“Snow.  In Green Hill? And w-why is it black?” He huddled himself together as the temperature dropped. “This isn’t g-good. I better get s-somewhere warm.” The hedgehog took one more look around before speeding off. As Sonic bounded through the scattered landscape, he grabbed various pieces of wood, rock and fruit along the way. Eventually, he came across a small cave near a waterfall.

“Guess I’m c-camping here.” Within minutes, the hedgehog had a fire roaring. “…of course, the fire is green.” He took a look at the fruit he had snagged. They were the usual fruit of the island but, as one would guess, were bizarre colors. Some striped blue and pink, some polka dot. Sonic shrugged as he stabbed them with some sticks and set them next to the fire. He stared at the dancing flame.

“So, obviously that weird light caused all this. But where the heck did it come from? Aw, cripes, this is probably Eggman’s doing, isn’t it?” He sighed before hearing a low growl coming from deeper within the cave. “That doesn’t sound good.” Sonic took a spare stick and set it aflame. He held the makeshift torch forward before spotting the source of the noise. “Oh. It’s just a Ricky.” Before he could approach the small, squirrel-like creature, it turned its face to him. “Eeee-EESSH!”

The normally adorable, fuzzy creature now had a large, singular eye encompassing its face. The pupil split slightly, revealing a set of sharp teeth as it hissed. It quickly scurried past the hedgehog.

“That, uh…um. Hm.” Sonic scratched the back of his head before sitting back down in front of the fire. He sat the torch down before a soft buzzing emanated through the cave. He pulled out a small radio from his shoe. “Oh, hey. Must be Tails. Maybe he knows something.” The hedgehog flicked a switch on the device.  “Hey, uh, Tails? This is Sonic. You copy? Over.” A loud buzzing echoed from the radio before a young, familiar voice replied.

“Darn thing. Barely getting a signal. Hey, can you read me, Sonic? Over.” Sonic sighed with relief.

“Loud and clear, Tails. Over.”

“Thank goodness. I was starting to get worried. Where are you? Over.”

“Still in Green Hill, but something weird’s going on. Scratch that. Bizarre is more like it. Over.” Sonic heard a loud crash from the other side of the radio.

“YOU’RE STILL THERE?! Wh-what’s going on? Are you okay? Tell me what’s happening RIGHT NOW!”

“Woah, WOAH! Easy! What’s going on with you? Something wrong?” Sonic asked. He heard a sigh.

“Sorry, sorry. It’s just…something really weird happened a few minutes ago. A huge energy field suddenly enveloped all of South Island and some of its ocean. The only thing left is this huge, purple dome.” Tails explained.

“Really…Well, check this out…” Sonic then gave Tails a rundown of what he’d seen on the island; the strange light, the sudden change in colors, and everything else. With his story finished, Sonic listened for a response. “Well?”

“I…that is bizarre. Did you see what caused the light?” Tails asked.

“Hmm…Hey, yeah! Right before it flashed, I could’ve sworn it was a Chaos Emerald at the center. Same shape and everything.” Sonic replied.

“A Chaos Emerald? That can’t be right, though. I have the purple Emerald here in my workshop.” Tails said.

“Oh, yeah, that’s right. You were working on some new invention with it, right?” Sonic asked.

“Yeah. But, enough about that. You need to get out of there. Find the Tornado and get going!” Sonic stood up and looked out of the cave. He clenched the radio.

“Can’t do that, bud. Not before I find out what’s going on.” Tails sputtered on the other line.

“But, Sonic-!”

“No buts. Our friends could be in serious trouble here, especially with all this cold and snow. I can’t just leave ‘em behind like this.” The radio was silent for a moment before it let out a loud sigh.

“Oh, all right. But be careful, Sonic.” The blue blur chuckled.

“Aren’t I always?”

 

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Before I judge a story I always like to know three things

1 How old are you?

2 How much practice in writing you have so far? Any other fics, etc.

3 Finally, what's the premise of the fic?  The idea, goal, selling point. Something like that.

But for now, I'll tell this: as proof of concept "look at me, I can write" it's fine. Clear, readable, easy to follow.

As a standalone story you want to catch my attention: it's bland. It has Sonic talking to Tails and wondering why the weird thing happened. It lacks the hook.

 

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Ugh, yeah I was honestly wondering if I should submit this. I was liking the dialog but it overall felt like I didn't put enough action or something for a Sonic story. It's just been a while since I actually sat down to write something substantial. I guess I jumped the gun on putting this up before really going over it.

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Kinda. There isn't anything wrong with it, but it hard to get invested if basically nothing happens.

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